This is why I’m single

behaviour (mine or others) that explains why I’m single

Why I’m single

Why I am now certain that I am not fooling anyone

Dear Future Self,

If you’re in the supermarket, and your girlfriends wittily suggest that ‘you should get this ninja turtles toothbrush for your nightime guests’  – it’s time to accept the fact that your enjoyment of a good encounter with a younger guy is not even close to a secret.

Me.

Why I’m not doing it right (tinder, that is)

Dear Future Self,

If these are your tinder stats:

Matches: 47
Conversations: 7
Conversations with people you didn’t already know: 2
Number Exchanged: 1
Dates asked on: 2
Dates gone on: 0

You aren’t doing it right.

Me

P.S Tinder will not match you with local cats.

 

Why I think I finally have a crush

Dear Future Self,

A single good date does not constitute a marriage in the works, so keep calm and keep your pants on at all times.

And for heavens sake, please don’t ruin this by being.. well, you.

I’d really appreciate your co-operation on this one

Me.

So, here it is; the Valentines date.

We struggled to work out a good time to see a movie due to both working later than expected, and that conversation somehow ended in him suggesting we just hang out at my place.

Cue me: *panic*

(more…)

Why I’m single…. and a rodent

I was going to write a post about having no valentines date planned…. but then I found this;

image

I laughed so hard I made a weird, unattractive squeaky noise.

And just like that, my ‘valentines no date day’ post became redundant.