boys

Why I don’t trust people with the name voldemort

Dear future self,

If your brain says;
‘his name is voldermort, that’s probably a bad sign’
Then it is a bad sign.

Accept it.

Me

As a part of my fruitless, drunken, persuit of my next great date or horizontal dance partner, on Thursday night I had one of my top gal pals accompany me to a bar in the city, and act as quality control for potential male talent (because lets face it, I need help). (more…)

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Why younger guys should be busy looking good… and quiet

Dear Future Self,

You look good for your age is not a compliment. It is however, a sign that you have been deemed ‘old’ by the guy you just kissed.

Bail. Immediately

Me

Why I am currently winning at ‘the break up’

Dear Future Self,

When your ex shows up at a place he knows is your annual holiday destination, and has his new girl in arm, yet still feels the need to flip you the bird as he passes by, he probably isn’t over you.

Me.

P.S this means you are winning at the breakup.

Why I should be more selective about accepting friends requests on facebook

Dear Future self,

Dont ever let the behaviour of males suprise you.

Especially when it comes to matters of the D.

Me.

I feel this doesn’t need explaining but; I met a nice boy last night (yay) so I slept with him immediately.
So naturally I receive this from his best mate (who was hooking up with my bestie) the very next evening.

image

Oh no he didn’t.

Why I’m not better than science

Dear Future Self,

Ex boyfriends are bad news.
Don’t ever get drunk on oxytocin again.

Me.

P.S. You are not better than science.

So, it’s the number one rule of successfully cutting ties at the end of a relationship – stop sleeping together. No more sex. No matter how good it is, how easy, how familiar or how bad you want it – just don’t.

(more…)